Martin (John Amplas), a young man who looks around 20-years-old, boards a train in Indianapolis, Indiana for New York. At night, he breaks into a sleeping car and sedates a woman with a syringe full of narcotics. She struggles, but he tells her not to struggle or be upset because she wont feel pain. After a few minutes, the woman falls asleep, and Martin has sex with the unconscious woman. Afterwards, he slices her wrists with a razor blade so he can drink her blood. The woman bleeds to death in her sleep.
In the morning, the train stops in Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania where Martin disembarks. He is met by Tata Cuda (Lincoln Maazel) an elderly and hostile old man who claims to be his cousin from the Old World. Together, they travel by another train to the town of Braddock, a dying industrial suburb. They walk to Cuda's large house where he shows Martin his living quarters. Cuda then accuses Martin of being an 84-year-old vampire from his old country. He has taken in Martin because he is family, but tells him, "First I will save your soul. Then I shall destroy you." Martin denies being a vampire and implies that Cuda is merely his uncle rather than his cousin. Cuda then puts up strings of garlic on the doors to his and his granddaughter's room, and then holds up a small cross when Martin approaches him. Martin takes away the cross, and even takes a bite of the garlic mocking these attempts by saying bitterly, "There's no real magic... ever". Cuda tells Martin that he can come and go as he pleases. But he also warns Martin that he will kill him if he kills anyone in Braddock. He also tells Martin to stay away from his granddaughter Christine (Christine Forrest), whom arrives home from her job that evening.
Cuda introduces Christine to Martin, but also warns her to stay away from him. But Christine instead strikes up a friendship with Martin who confides in her about his vampire heritage. When Cuda later confirms Martin's claims to be a vampire, Christine, not surprisingly, refuses to believe either one. She thinks that Cuda and the other members of her family have driven Martin to insanity by making him think that he is a vampire. It is never revealed if Martin really is a vampire, or just a shy and lonely youth with troubled issues. Christine is the only person that Martin gets the courage to talk to. When Christine's boyfriend Arthur (Tom Savini) arrives at the house for dinner, Martin stops talking and backs away despite Arthur's attempt at a conversation. Christine later confides in Martin that she hopes to leave Braddock someday with Arthur, even though Martin points out that Arthur treats her badly and is both verbally and physically abusive towards her.
When Christine sees that Martin won't talk to anyone else, she buys him a phone which he installs in his room. Martin begins to repeatingly call a radio talk show where he describes what it's like to be a vampire. He becomes known on the radio as "the Count" to all the listeners. But the patronizing host (Michael Gornick) thinks he's just crazy.
Martin gets a job at Cuda's grocery store of stocking shelves, hauling boxes around, and even gets to be a delivery boy for some of the customers. One of his customers is a certain Abby Santini (Elyane Nadeau), who becomes taken in with Martin. She is a very friendly young woman who is depressed when she tells Martin that her husband is unfaithful. But Martin still does not have the nerve to talk with her, so she is happy to have someone to confide in with her life problems. Martin phones the radio show host to describe his infatuation with the housewife and senses that she wants to have sex with him. When the radio show host asks Martin if it is a sexual problem that he has involving women criticizing him during sex, Martin replies that he has never had sex with a woman who was awake.
One day, Martin travels by train to outside Braddock to look for victims. At a supermarket, he follows a young woman (Sarah Venable) home to her posh suburban house. He sees the woman's husband (Richard Rubenstein) leave for a long business trip, and Martin decides this would be the right time for more feeding. Martin returns to the house after dark and breaks in through the garage door. But it is Martin who gets the surprise when he bursts into her bedroom to find her in bed with her adulterous lover Lewis (Al Levitsky). After a vicious struggle, Martin jabs both of them with hyprodermic needles with narcotics, and waits for the drugs to take affect. He drags the unconscious body of Lewis from the house to a clump of trees across the street where he kills him by shoving a broken tree branch into his neck and drinks his blood. Martin returns to the house where he has sex with the unconscious woman. But out of compassion and pity, he decides to let her live.
Martin begins to have romantic monochrome visions of his vampire past (real or imagined), where he drained blood from a young woman and was chased through the streets of a nameless European town by a torch-lit mob.
During one Sunday at church, Cuda brings home Father Howard (George A. Romero) who asks him about the possibility of exorcism and demon possession. Father Howard calls upon the elderly Father Zulemans (Clifford Forrest, Jr.) over at Cuda's request. Together, Cuda and Zulemans confront Martin his bedroom and attempt to perform an exorcism on him. At this point, Martin remembers (another real or imaginary flashback), in the Old Country of people trying to perform an exorcism on him, and he flees them. Martin then flees from Cuda and Zuelmas as well. A little later that night, Martin terrorizes Cuda in a children's playground when he puts on a Dracula cape and puts false fangs into his mouth to pretend that he really is a vampire.
One day, Martin finally musters the courage to talk with Mrs. Santini during a routine delivery to her house where he tells her that he's aware of her attempts to seduce him and wants now to have sex with her. After having sex for the first time, Mrs. Santini becomes more depressed for she tells Martin that her husband just left her because she discovered that she cannot bear children, and that her desires towards him are based on sex and nothing else. But Martin wants to stay with her and help her move on with her life. Martin tells the radio show host about his affair with the housewife and that he no longer has the urge to attack other women.
Meanwhile, Arthur meets with Cuda and tells him that he wants Christine to leave town with him so they can get married and start a family. But Christine becomes angry at Cuda when he tells Arthur that insanity runs in their family and he shouldn't consider having children with her. Shortly afterwards, Christine packs up and leaves Braddock for New York with Arthur despite Martin telling her that Arthur is abusive towards her. But her mind is made up. Before leaving, Christine tells Martin that she really has no ill feelings towards him and just wants to make a fresh start with her life. She says goodbye to him and promises to write. But Martin knows that with an abusive and possessive man in Christine's life, she probably won't.
Depressed over losing his one true friend, Martin phones the radio show host and tells him that he's getting "shaky" and wants to go out looking for more victims. That night, Martin travels to a rough crime-ridden area of Pittsburgh and attacks two derelicts in a alley, injecting them with narcotics. He kills one of them by silting the bum's wrist and drinking his blood. Martin is about to kill the second one when a police car shows up and gives chase. Martin narrowly escapes during a long chase on foot which leads from the garbage strew streets and through a local store. Martin runs into an old warehouse where a drug deal is going down. A shootout between the two cops and the three thugs begins where all of them are killed, leaving Martin as the sole survivor who casually walks away from the carnage.
One day, Martin finds Mrs. Santini dead in her bathtub, after she had slit her writs with a razor blade. Martin anonymously calls the police to report the body and leaves. He phones the radio show host one final time to say that he really doesn't need friends or people to talk to for he is his own person. But when Cuda learns about Mrs. Santini's suicide, is mistakenly thinks Martin killed her and made it look like a suicide as he's done before. Cuda walks into Martin's room while he is asleep and kills him by hammering a wooden stake through Martin's heart.
Cuda buries Martin's body in his back garden, while over the closing credits various voices from people are heard talking to the radio show host asking the whereabouts of "the Count".
欣赏不来。过于无厘头又把剧情切得稀碎不仅让人难以投入又没法完全放弃理解而娱乐不起来。选角和剧本在华人设定下互相绑架。一比较终于体会到星爷的功力了。
前半段觉得是一个脑洞片，后面越来越觉得想简单了，看到最后直接哭懵逼。非常奇妙的观影体验……最后懵逼了半小时左右，觉得导演已经把家庭中我最想表达的东西讲完了。
人物的情感动机和行为逻辑都是垮掉的，支撑电影的是一地碎成渣的屎尿屁无厘头和炫酷特效，完全是好莱坞工业走到尽头的样子
这个结局烂透了，又回到了相亲相爱一家人，搞半天多元宇宙就是包裹家庭伦理的噱头，还是石头宇宙最好了
真正尊重女性的电影，是不用任何标签和任何想法叠加在她身上的，只需要把她丢进生活里。你知道你为什么会变成了活成这样吗？因为你在这个时空是最烂的你，因为最烂的你所以分裂了更好的你。所有天马行空的想象远不止于想象，我在最烂的平行时空做最烂的自己，也请平行时空的我做最好的我。所有想象与剪接最后归化为东南亚家庭无奈的和解与原谅，和解自己，和解家庭，和解亲情，和解爱情。热狗手还有脚能弹钢琴，石头也能开出解语花，爱你，不分宇宙，因为我是我，我是女儿，我是妻子，我是你妈！！杨紫琼是一个非常奇特的存在，《艺伎回忆录》的章子怡和巩俐就压不住她，所以当她拿回属于自己的剧本，而别的人拿不到的时候，她就已经干死一大片了，期待杨紫琼阿姨顺利奥提！走遍大大小小电影节！2023年华语女星第一名！剧本写的真漂亮，剪辑也很棒！
满分大麻电影，反大女主的救赎电影，主题成人化+Z世代烟火气，这种双重定位和形式夸张可能会导致本片主题被低估。——行无相而度众生，是菩萨行。
2.美籍华人奴颜婢膝，明明中国进入2022年了，他们却仿佛被遗弃在旧金山上个世纪的唐人街里
疫情后最好的商业院线片。其实本质跟《信条》是一路的，用各种信息过载来营造奇观，内核却保守到可能连主创自己都没想明白，很多设定纯靠嘴说也绝非上策。但相比诺兰这种大片模范生，两位Daniel在A24的庇护下能玩得更cult，迷影梗应接不暇（就连丈夫的演员都是当年《宇宙追缉令》的副导演），130分钟亳无尿点更是优秀。最后，希望杨紫琼杀爆明年颁奖季。
▫️本人，科幻+奇幻片重度爱好者+泪点极低，看了这部电影不喜欢也丝毫不感动…年度期待很高失望很深排名前3了。
石头后面不太想看了已经，对“爱能战胜一切”的结局感到疲倦
亚洲家庭与代际隔阂所造成的痛苦够华裔导演拍几十年了
看了个变种漫威/DC超英片“洗衣侠”。中间有挺长一段生理极度不适，把王家卫李安库布里克拼在一起后导致的燥狂症大爆发。
【3】Hyper Pop式电影。其实本该是漫威DC应达到的水平：高概念题材（多元宇宙），同时涉及现实映射（东亚家庭顽疾）和人物内在的转变弧线（自我价值实现）。结果A24做出来了，大概会是厂牌更加主流的一个里程碑，唯一的“独立个性”可能潜藏在那些成人向元素。总的来说还可以，陈词滥调里透出些新意，喜剧段落精彩纷呈，也喜欢片中的亚文化意趣展示和戏仿桥段，浸淫于互联网的Gen Z一代自然容易喜爱，感受上如同刷Tik Tok。不过仍觉得目前全球范围的好评程度过誉了，尤其岩石宇宙的处理真的很糟。
7分，其实去掉那些花里胡哨的，本质就是一部功夫喜剧。母女的话题其实讲得并不算太好，有点来的生硬也去得随意，不过倒是可以跟《青春变形记》对照着看。其他那些多元宇宙、穿越来穿越去的噱头都是佐料。最大的意义就是给杨紫琼和关继威更多的表演空间，其实更喜欢关在片中的表现，显然他更抢眼。
我真是服了好莱坞现在的调性，无论多么离谱的设定牛逼的特效最后内核都离不开家庭伦理剧……对了还要加一点lgbt的政治正确……仿佛世界末日前不跟家庭成员和解一下的宇宙就不完整。就算闺女成了各平行宇宙大魔头最后仍然可以来个青春期中二少女跟妈妈抱抱大和解；《不要抬头》讽刺程度拉满了……最后主角一家人仍然要手拉手共赴末日……
期间那些絮絮叨叨的哲思探讨，化为一段段创意十足的视觉比喻，场景间无厘头的转换让人目不暇接，快餐时代的你未必跟得上如此多元宇宙间主角的冒险，剪辑蒙太奇简直绝绝子。
如果故事在石头宇宙结束，本片将成为虚无主义者的有力宣言；但最后四十分钟，导演仍然告诉我们爱可以解决一切问题。至少在今天，我想这个主题带给我们的精神价值已经足够。
个人觉得电影到变成石头的时候就可以，后面中国家庭式的团结和好太理想化了，父母和孩子之间的矛盾并不是通过说教才能化解。
剧情是花里胡哨的好看，最终收尾在母女和解上。蛮能体会这种虚无主义的，这世界不如毁灭好了。
最后感叹，做个石头就行了。
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